Get to know your work colleague, before dating
For most people, the workplace often forms a part of their social circle. We see and talk to our colleagues every day; workplace crushes are bound to happen. Is it okay to have a crush at work? Of course! But crushes in the workplace are tricky, you do not want to come off too strong by repeatedly asking someone out you don’t know that well.
On the other hand, it is okay to want to get to know your colleague rather than making shy eye contact with them for months on end. The best romances often stem from friendship.
Here are 5 ways to get to know your work colleague, before dating
1. Connect with them on social media
Whether it’s Facebook, Instagram or even snapchat, social media can be a great subtle signal that you want to get to know someone better. A lot of the time a friend request is a lot less daunting then immediately approaching someone. It can also provide insight into someone on a more personal level, allowing you to bond with them over their hobbies and interests.
2. Have a work lunch date, not a real date
Work lunches can be a great way of taking the pressure of a ‘date’ out of hanging out. It can be as easy as, “I’m popping to the local sushi place for lunch, want to come?” This way the person can easily accept or decline, without the pressure of romance or awkward rejection.
3. Running an errand? Invite them!
Let’s say you need to get a retirement gift or pick a birthday cake, invite them along. This is a great excuse to hang out and can give you time to chat outside the workplace without the drama of asking them out.
4. Knock-off drinks
You don’t have to always hang out one-on-one. Inviting a group of people to grab a drink is a great way to get to know people on a more personal level. Sit close to them in the group, chat with friends and let loose a little. Just make sure you don’t have too many drinks; we don’t want any embarrassing confessions.
5. Take advantage of chit-chat
Don’t be afraid to initiate casual chats during work. Walk out of work with them, have a chat while making tea, say good morning, all these things can make someone feel far more comfortable around you.
Other things to consider
Asking someone out from work often isn’t just a little thing. Work is a place you frequent every day, so you don’t want to disrupt your peace. Seriously dating someone comes with the responsibility of deciding how you navigate that at work, and it can even mean one person moves jobs. Secondly, if you’re still in the early stages, you don’t want to make someone at work uncomfortable. So, if they avoid your suggestions to hangout, try to be self-aware and take that as a ‘no’.
All these suggestions give you an opportunity to read the signs before asking someone out. Are they receptive to you wanting to hangout? Do they like your Instagram posts? Maybe it’s time to, respectfully, make a move. This way, when you do go on a date you will already be comfortable with each other. And who knows, maybe you’ll find your Jim to your Pam.
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Meliorist & Director